What can we learn from the fall of Mandelson?

Swift will not add to the torrent of commentary on the defenestration of Lord Mandelson for the third (and presumably final) time. Petie – as his dear old pal Jeffrey Epstein used to call him - can now return home to contemplate his outstanding collection of British banknotes, although some at least of the wealthy clients of his consultancy business, Global Counsel, will perhaps be less inclined to hire his services.

The notion that this some kind of Greek tragedy, in which a noble but flawed hero is brought low by hubris, belongs in the more excitable public prints. Mandelson was just all flaw and no cattle, to paraphrase a Texan saying – a glorified PR man who buzzed around annoyingly and every time was given a real big boy job managed to cock it up.

There are two lessons from his fall– one obvious, the other less so.

First, what is wrong with Sir Keir Starmer? First Rayner, now this. What next? What on earth next? The man is a quite senior lawyer, is he not? Around Mandelson there always hung a slight odour of dubiousness, a sense – as Swift remembers people saying in his youth – of something not quite pukka. Not quite straight, old boy. Do leading human rights lawyers actually like that sort of chap? One assumes not.

Apparently the security services were not hanging out the bunting when Mandelson got the plum FCO Washington job. They saw him for the wrong’un he surely was. Did Sir Keir, who promised us a government so squeaky clean it could have been given a guest role in a Cillit Bang ad, raise a majestic hand and say ‘Stop this folly’? Apparently not. Even after the frankly awful interchanges between Mandy and Epstein were spread all over the Telegraph, the rusty axe of Keir was stayed until he’d had a nice sleep and tucked into his cornflakes. No rush, mate.

Clement Attlee once responded simply to some jobsworth minister who asked why he was being sacked: ‘Not up to the job’. Who on earth, readers, does that remind you of?

Swift’s second lesson goes wider. Why does the United Kingdon end up hosting a career like Mandelson’s, a man rising without trace, as someone once said about David Forst (the former TV bloke, not the estimable current peer)? Why also do we have Sir Keir?

Because, dear readers, we have created a system in which mediocrity can flourish because Parliament is so weak, democracy has surrendered to quangocracy, lawyers have replaced legislators, and voters have – quite understandably - given up caring. Given Britain more-or-less invented the whole idea of parliamentary sovereignty and the rule of law, it is really rather sad that we have vandalised the whole set-up. Unless we sort it out soon, there will even more – Swift shudders - Mandelsons and more Starmers. Not a happy thought.